Seismic Twitch

I know, I should be doing homework and all that. But…it’s homework! So without further ado, I’m going to play with the meme that Brad at Southern Expressions did.

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what did you say?
I remember seeing myself in passing. I’d just showered and combed out the knots and spare hair (I’m knitting another me), but I don’t remember thinking anything at all.

2.When is the next time you will kiss someone?
That will probably be Boy at his bedtime.

3. What’s a word that rhymes with “DOOR”?
Galore

4. Favorite planet?
I like Earth, it sort of keeps me alive. However, if it’s a planet other than the one that sustains my life I’d have to pick Saturn. It’s so showy and fancy and colourful. It’s sort of the peacock of the planets

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell?
That would’ve been Bran phoning me for some reason. He and Boy are the only people who phone my cell to talk to me. Anyone else wants to talk to someone else, ergo it’s a wrong number.

6. What is your favorite ring on your phone? .
I use a classical music ring. I can’t remember offhand what it is though. I just know that no one else uses it.

7. What shirt are you wearing?
A white t-shirt that a practicum student gave to me before she went back to school. It’s a “Take Back the Night” shirt for Sutherland House in Fort Smith NWT. It’s probably one of the more dear gifts I’ve received from anyone who wasn’t Boy or Bran.

8. Do you “label” yourself?
Labels are so restricting. I’m human.

9. Name the brand of shoes you’re currently wearing?
I’m not. I’m barefoot. However, today I wore Ecco sandals to school

10. Bright or Dark Room?
Both. I prefer a dark room to sleep in, and a bright room if I’m going to be awake. If I can tolerate the concept of “outdoors” and “people” then I open the blinds in the daytime. If not, they stay closed and things remain dull coloured.

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
Well, I don’t really know Brad, but he seems like a nice guy. I like that he spends time with his bird. They’re more needy than children and dogs.

12. If you’re alone in a room with two beds, which one do you sleep on?
Whichever of the two are firmer.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Getting ready for bed. In fact, at midnight I was setting my phone alarm for the early morning rising so I could have time to shower.

14. What was your last text message you received on your cell?
I’m here.

15. Where is your mail box?
It’s on the exterior wall to the immediate left of the front door

16.What’s a saying that you say a lot?
Fuck a duck and sell the quacks!

17.Who told you he/she loved you last?
Boy

18. Last furry thing you touched?
I think that was last June

19. How many times have you done it in the last three days?
It? None.

20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?
None

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
It’s hard to pick a favourite, but I’d say that my 40s have been the best since I have my shit together far more and am feeling more emotionally settled than at any other time in my life

22. Your worst enemy?
Dingy yello wax buildup?

23. What is your current desktop picture?

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
Sure.

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly, which would you take?
The million dollars

26. Do you like someone?
Yes

27. The last song you listened to?
Everything – Alanis Morrisette

28. If the last person you spoke to was getting shot at, would you jump in front of the bullet?
Yes, the last person I spoke to was Boy

29. If you could punch 1 person in the face who’s in your life right now, who would it be?
I don’t want to punch anyone anymore. Besides, it would hurt me too.

30. What is the closest object to your left foot?
A footstool, under my left foot.

Today was an interesting day. It was quite neat in some ways.

I got up and showered. That’s not anything really special, but the fact that I’m showering regularly now is a good thing. The depression I was in after the hand surgery is pretty much in abayance, at least for now. Bran was awake already when I got up. After my shower, he served me a couple of fried eggs and toast. It was quite yummy and I enjoyed it trememdously.

On my ride to school I got rained on. This wouldn’t have been a worry had I been prepared for it. However, I was wearing shorts and no rain gear. My laptop was protected within my back pack, but that was the closest to rain ready that I was. Luckily for me, the rain was sort of a heavy sprinkle, rather than an actual downpour. So not only did I not get soaked, but I avoided that nasty streak up my butt. Yay! By the time I was settled in for class and cooling down, it had stopped raining.

I spent lunch in the GLBTA centre. Today I had an education from one of the gents who drops in daily for his lunch (he works for the student council). I learned about how “Queer” is a label that is inclusive lable. It all started out when I was reading an article and it had a few initials that I was totally clueless about. So, part of the initials were eays, Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender. However there were more TIQQ. That is “Two Spirit” which is applicable to someone of Native/First Nations ancestry. I can’t remember what the “I” was, but one Q is “Questionng” and the last is “Queer.” In the end we sort of came to the conclusion that it was not only about being able to include as many self-identification labels as possible and the other part was confusing as many people as possible.

After lunch it was off to the deviance class. We got to see part of a really cool video about male violence called “Tough Guise.” It’s really neat. The sociologist who authored the theories that are used within the movie talked about how the image of masculinity has gotten more and more violent over the years and how great a disservice society is doing to men by creating such violent examples for male children growing up. It really is a great video and should be watched by men and boys everywhere. He spoke of how much violence is inflicted by men onto other people and how nearly 75% of violence that men commit isn’t on women, but on other men. This would mean that men would or should have a vested interest in creating a ideal that would be a little less violent, if only out of self-preservation. It’s really a good video if you ever get a chance to see it.

After that it was time for a short discussion and then we all scarpered. The reason? We had a substitute prof. Our regular prof had to be away for training for her work. We also don’t have a class tomorrow because she’s having some sort of issue with cancer (her words) and tomorrow is being reserved for “procedures.” I wish her much luck with them. She’s awefully young.

My first class was really quite interesting, as it usually is. This time we learned that our prof wouldn’t have time to correct our papers over the weekend. This came up because she asked how people were getting along with their papers and there was many of those “looks” that student get when it’s a hard slog. So, being me, I suggested that perhaps changing the due date to Monday would help us out and leave her weekend free of any feeling of obligation. Of course I broached it in terms of her convenience. She saw through that, but the rest of the class thought my idea was brilliant. I’m good that way. So that’s the way things are now with the class. So, now I have a critique and a reaction paper due on Monday, I also write a final that day and have one the next. This term is just nuts. Three weeks is way too short a time to have to even pretend to cover a class that normally takes 3 months in regular term. But we’re doing it.

Tomorrow student loan is paid out again. So rent gets paid, and I pick up my reading package for the next quarter. I’m a bit torn about whether I want to come straight home or else wait around until 11 and pick up a pita and then come home. I’ll probably just come home. It saves money and allows me the luxury of getting in a nap before I have to stick my face in a text or try and figure out what sociological theory is being talked about for the papers.

I napped today. I wasn’t feeling enormously tired, but I knew then, and still know now, that I have a metric tonne of reading to get done and I have to get at goodly portion of it done now so that I can concentrate on making notes and doing up a chart of the theories, their theorists, the alterations to those theories, who altered them and what the basic premises of the theories are. I think that if I do a chart for each class I should be able to keep them separate. It’s not that they cover different theories or theorists, but the detail and focus of each class is slightly different. I want to do really well on both my finals.

On that note, I need to go and read other people (just to finish my nap break and procrastinate that little bit more) and then get on with the process of cramming information into the “leetle grey cells” as Hercule Poirot called them.

Ta-Ra

First, thank you, Enviroboi, for the information about lead. I knew that it was a nasty one because of the problems it can cause a fetus, infants and children, but it never occurred ot me that it would be such a long lasting nasty. I don’t know why that never occurred to me though. Oh well. I’m not a chemist/biologist/biochemist type person.

I got my midterm marks back today. I am happy to say that I passed both. I got 79% in Social Deviance and Social Control. I managed to get 91% in Intro to Criminology. That’s my first ever 91% in university. In fact, I think it’s my first since elementary school. I was blown over. Were it not for the fact that my table is at front and didn’t have to walk more than 3 feet to my chair, I think I woulld’ve fallen over.

Today’s weather was a mixed bag. When I rode to school it was sort of moisty misty type, scattered Scots mist comes to mind. I was soaked when I got to school, but not from the rain. I had to dress to keep dry from road spatter. This afternoon, it was lovely. While I was in class there was thunder and lightening and a shower. That wet the roads requiring me to wear my rain pants. Rain pants (being as they’re not very porous) make my legs sweat. Add to that little layer a pair of sweats and you’ve got one very hot woman (and not in a slang way) I have my fan on and I’m trying to dry out and cool down.

The government sent me notice that the $4000 Millenium Bursary that was awarded to me for the 2005-2006 school year has been deposited against my debt. I thought, on first reading, that they awarded me another one, but I was mistaken, it was just a notice of deposit. I’d rather have that money in my pocket. It’s just not fair. I guess it’s ok though. I’ll probably get another one next year and also the provincial ones for having a dependant. This bursary, along iwht the one from the province, lowers my debt load by a bit over a semester of loans. This will keep my payments lower. That’s a good thing.

I’ve still not heard from Dad. I don’t know if I shall or not. Something in me feels that this was the final straw. He could handle that I was victimized. Hey, he can handle that his son committed a severe criminal act when he sexually abused me. He could even handle it when I reported it to the police. This may have pushed things a bit too far. But I’m ok with that. I do feel far better that he knows. It’s not going to accidently slip out in a conversation. The best part is now I don’t have to hide my “Sorry I missed church, I was busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.” Heh. Who knew that little bumper sticker would be true?

Tonight’s agenda has me reading an article and beginning the writing of a critique of it. After I get a rough of that done, then it’s back to the text book and…oh shit. I have to read an article for tomorrow’s discussion in deviance. This one is called “Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder: Constructing Deviance, Constructing Order.” Oy!

I scammed some free stuff from the G/L/B/T/A centre today. One of them is a collapsable flying disc for Boy, a couple anti-racisim stickers and a package of tissue…oh, and a little ruler. They’re all about sexuality, acceptance and incluson. The tissue are going to be handy. I’m tired of not having a hankie when I need it. It was free and you get about 2 times the amount you get in a brand name packet. Yay for free things!!

That’s it for today.

Ta-Ra

I’m reading my criminology text and in one section the author talks about theorists proposing that lead poisoning, or rather, higher levels of lead in the body, has been linked to certain behaviour problems. My question is, to anyone out there who knows about this stuff, does the lead get processed out of the body once a person has been removed from the environment that had elevated lead levels?

I’d look it up, but I don’t have the time to hunt down an accurate answer on the internet.

Thanks to any knowledgable person.

I’ve got 6 chapters in criminology to read as well as 3 readings for deviance.

It’s going to be an interesting week.

If you know to whom credit for this bit of poesy goes to, please let me know. The photocopy I have doesn’t have have the poet’s name on it at all. This was given to me while I was taking a workshop called “Effectiveness Training” while I was still a service user at Tamara’s House. Part of the two hour (for 8 weeks) sessions was about claiming our own issues and letting go of other people’s issues. This was a part of that particular day’s work.

EDIT: Thanks to dear Mush there is now credit for the poem:

By: Veronica Shoffstall, 1971

After a while you learn the subtle difference
Between holding a hand
And chaining a soul
And you learn…
That love doesn’t mean owing
And company doesn’t mean security
And you begin to learn
That kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of a man or a woman
Not the grief of a child
And you learn to build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way of alling down in mid-flight
After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns
If you ask too much
So you plant your garden and decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn…
And you learn…
With every goodbye
You learn…….

I’m pouting because your comments thing isn’t working for me today. So instead, here it is:

thank you for putting up the pictures! i really liked two of them. of course, you’re quite the dashing handsome man in the last one, but i think the best one is the second one, where it looks like you’re saying “talk to the hand.” i love that one.

Go see Colorado Knits and read about knitting and musicals. You’d be surprised how well the two go together…or maybe you wouldn’t.

Boy said that he’d write my finals for me. He even promised. Of course, he also promised me a zero average. I don’t think I’ll take him up on his offer, as kind and generous as it is.

Today I read and made notes on sexual deviance, physical deviance (voluntary and involuntary) and now I’m in the process making notes on mental disorders. It’s quite interesting. Deviance is such a pliable and circumstantial concept.

Part of the physical deviance that was spoken about was anorexia. In fact, the ideal of thin is so permeated through our society right now, that a person has to be nearly emaciated for someone to say, “That’s too thin.” However, the deviance of “too fat” is much more quickly reached and frequently, isn’t applicable according to medical standards.

Reading about anorexia motivated me (yesterday) to investigate “pro-Ana” websites. Most of them are written by young women and teens. They all recognized the underlying mental condition, socialialization and risks of not eating, but all but one said those are the prices they’re willing to pay, all for the desire to be thin. They have pictures of what they call “thinspiration.” Many of the photos are of performers and Hollywood actresses who are nearly painfully thin. There wasn’t a healthy looking person there. They also had tricks and tips to hiding their condition to avoid being forced into treatment.

It was downright scary. The desire to be thin is so strong, that they’re willing to kill themselves to get to what they want. One spoke of buying some fast food, throwing out the food and keeping the wrappers and throwing them out while they’re being seen to give the impression that they’ve eaten. Another hint was to cut their food into tiny pieces and shifting it about on their plate to make it appear that they’ve eaten something. It was so frightening to read that.

Another girl, she’s in recovery. She still has some issues, like exercising excessively to keep from gaining weight. She fell while she was roller blading and shattered her elbow. Her bones were so brittle from the years of starving herself that the bones shattered like a crystal bowl hitting concrete. It’s going to take some time to heal from that.

I have to finish my notes and then reread the article that I’m supposed to do a reaction paper to for the deviance class. Here’s hoping I do reasonably well on it. I don’t have quite the same passion about this new article about drug scares as I did about the “squeegee kids” of Toronto. I hope I can find something to feel passionate about. At least I know it’s one thing, it’s another piece of Marxian theory with the proletariat being down trodden by the big bad bourgeoisie. Of course, it’s true, but I wouldn’t have minded having an article that had a different theoretical base.

That’s it. I’m going to read other people’s lives and then head back into the world of sociology, sociological theory and stigmatization.

Ta-Ra

I did. I got up at 7 am instead of 6:15 am. I started my day out as usual, with reading my daily dose of comics and forums. Then I began reading the deviance text to get that all done. I’m officially caught up to the end of term in the text. Now all I have to do is write notes on them and do the reaction paper that’s due on Monday afternoon. I’m already a chapter ahead for criminal and I have until Thursday to get the paper done for that. It shouldn’t be too bad.

I put together the big part of Enviroboi’s house heating present. It’ll be several pieces in total, this is just one component to it. Of course, it’s the tackiest, but all home crafts can be that. I wonder where I can get a minature flamingo….

That’s about it from here. There’s nothing really exciting happening. Bran and Boy have gone out. I”m not sure if they’re delivering flyers or if they’re going to get the video game that Boy wanted. It’ll be one or the other.

I’m thinking of having a nap. I really naps a lot. Since I’m in classes 4 days a week I don’t get to undulge like I did last month.

Ta-Ra

I deleted my entire file of online comics bookmarks. You want to talk about pissed off!! However, thanks to my lists in the history and the listings on this blog, I have most of my comics back again. Thank goodness. I moved the file away from the undecided list that I have the one’s I”m checking on just to make sure that I don’t make that error again. I still can’t believe that I did that.

Nertz!!