For You Warm Weather People
Found on the wall of the Soc. Grad. Students Office
50 F (10C)
Californians shiver uncontrolably.
Canadians plant gardens.
35 F (1.6C)
Italian cars won’t start.
Canadians drive with the windows down.
32 F (0C)
American water freezes.
Canadian water gets thicker.
0 F (-17.9C)
New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
Canadians have the last cookout of the season.
-60 F (-51C)
Mt. St. Helens freezes.
Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.
-100 F (-73C)
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Canadians pull down their ear flaps.
-173 F (-114C)
Ethyl alcohol freezes.
Canadians get frustrated when they can’t thaw the keg.
-460 F (-273C)
Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops.
Canadians start saying “Cold, eh?”
-500 F (-295C)
Hell freezes over.
The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.
(Carrel mate Bronwen says, “Candians finally close the bathroom window”)