Queer Me
Here’s an entry that sat on my Diary-X blog. It’s my story of why it is that Bran and I remain married despite me being a lesbian and him being a man. We’ve now been married over 20 years. I’ve grown accustomed to his face.
I’m celebate and he’s ok with that. I like him. He’s one of the few adults I feel safe around in close proximity. He’s one of the few adults who bothered to work at gaining my trust (though there have been a few dear friends added on to that list). I like him. It would be a financial disaster for both of us if we split up. We actually are good for each other most of the time. The sexual abuse makes the concept of intense intimacy with anyone, other than someone I’ve known well for a long time, nigh impossible right now. Creating and maintaining relationships takes a lot of energy. I’m learning how to maintain a regular friendship with women. Anything more will have to wait. I love him, and though I’m not in love with him we have years invested in our relationship and learning how to live together with relative harmony. We respect each other’s spaces. I couldn’t have custom ordered a better friend.
